I set the day aside for fasting and praying. I am desperate to hear from God in terms of our next move with the adoption. And, of course, it has been one of those days where homeschool and cleaning and the baby and the laundry and the arguing brothers and all the other things that demanded my attention had me sitting on the edge of a tearful cliff. I didn't want to cry because I was sad or mad and hurt. It's just that it seemed like my body had been insisting on doing so for most of the day thinking it would bring some kind of relief.
It was wrong.
The Bison Booties status took my be surprise and kinda ripped out my heart. I am so happy for whoever SarahKayHoffman is and her precious family! Yet, I felt a little self-centered pain.
Here we are two years into this...
...and no matter what we decide, it is going to feel like starting over.
I keep trying to turn that into a positive.
However, today, all I could do was hang my head at my own "unfilled booties" and the fact that they will remain so for quite some time....